Growing up I was the chubby nerdy girl who pretty much sat with her nose in a book. I hung out with the "average" people, the ones who didn't belong in any particular group just hung out with whoever would. I grew up in the 80's and 90's, I graduated in 1998. I don't remember teenage suicide though I did remember when I was 14 I was being bullied by a boy in middle school. I remember buying diet pills and taking more than I should just to see if I could get myself thin. I tried to overdose on them but failed nonetheless. I think it was mere cowardliness on my part, I was scared to die but I was also depressed..not a good combo.
I came across this website and it really hit home. How can we teach our children that bullying is not okay? How can we make sure our kids are safe and that we don't have to worry about them using a variety of methods to try and end their life?
Communication!
Without communication children are naive to the outside world. We have to teach our children that love and understanding is more important than hating someone because they are different. My children are exposed to different kinds of people because I want them to learn love. My friends are gay men and yes, I think that its okay for my children to know that they are, I think its important that they know. We can't change people's minds but we can educate them and teaching them to love everyone no matter race, gender, and sexuality.
If my children see people that are different than they are and they ask me questions I will answer truthfully and sincerely and with LOVE not biased hatred. Hate breeds hate and thats one thing my children will not be.
As I was dropping my entrecards on various bloggers sites I came across this one and I thought it was a perfect idea for my post tonight.
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Monday, April 23, 2012
Having an Adele moment...
Excuse me for a moment while I have this because I either debate on eating a whole package of cookies or write this post..I chose not to add more fat to my stomach so here goes.
I understand that this blog is attached to my facebook but right now I don't care, I am pouring my heart out because of the horrible day I have had.
I felt bad that my daughter had to have 4 shots though I have to say that before it happened she was all excited about getting them not knowing exactly what it pertained.
I had a talk with a guy that I fell for, harder than anyone else I met. We stopped talking for awhile due to the fact that he tore my heart in two. We made up through facebook messages a few months ago and then lived our lives. I had to talk to him about some things then my feelings for him came up again and I hate it, I hate that my heart still longs for him. I will never be with him since he's in love with someone else. I'm trying my best to be happy for him and move on but its still hard.
After my ex and I split I had my heart broken a lot, looking for that void that needed to be filled that my ex neglected to do because alcohol and his own business were more important. When I met this guy I tried hard not to fall for him because of what had happened before with other guys but it was difficult for me. I spent a lot of time with him when I wasn't working or having the kids. I then realized you can't make someone fall in love with you and I know that from past guys that have came and gone in my life.
I now have a guy here that wants to be with me but I still am iffy because I have issues with trusting guys and this guy knows it. He is trying but in my heart I just can't. I guess I really am not ready to be in a serious relationship even though I want one. Loneliness sucks but its better than getting hurt again. There are times where I just don't get it, I never really understood why people say they are in love, I guess because when I was with my ex I thought I was in love but never really "felt" it if that makes sense. I never really felt "in love" just the feeling of being wanted and loved. I was married to someone who wasn't the marrying type and there are times where I think I'm not either and never was. I want to feel that, I want to feel the butterflies and the spark and all that silly love crap.
I wish nothing but the best for him and I'm glad we are friends. I will never have him, maybe in another life, but definitely not this one and maybe its for the best, only fate can determine that.
I understand that this blog is attached to my facebook but right now I don't care, I am pouring my heart out because of the horrible day I have had.
I felt bad that my daughter had to have 4 shots though I have to say that before it happened she was all excited about getting them not knowing exactly what it pertained.
I had a talk with a guy that I fell for, harder than anyone else I met. We stopped talking for awhile due to the fact that he tore my heart in two. We made up through facebook messages a few months ago and then lived our lives. I had to talk to him about some things then my feelings for him came up again and I hate it, I hate that my heart still longs for him. I will never be with him since he's in love with someone else. I'm trying my best to be happy for him and move on but its still hard.
After my ex and I split I had my heart broken a lot, looking for that void that needed to be filled that my ex neglected to do because alcohol and his own business were more important. When I met this guy I tried hard not to fall for him because of what had happened before with other guys but it was difficult for me. I spent a lot of time with him when I wasn't working or having the kids. I then realized you can't make someone fall in love with you and I know that from past guys that have came and gone in my life.
I now have a guy here that wants to be with me but I still am iffy because I have issues with trusting guys and this guy knows it. He is trying but in my heart I just can't. I guess I really am not ready to be in a serious relationship even though I want one. Loneliness sucks but its better than getting hurt again. There are times where I just don't get it, I never really understood why people say they are in love, I guess because when I was with my ex I thought I was in love but never really "felt" it if that makes sense. I never really felt "in love" just the feeling of being wanted and loved. I was married to someone who wasn't the marrying type and there are times where I think I'm not either and never was. I want to feel that, I want to feel the butterflies and the spark and all that silly love crap.
I wish nothing but the best for him and I'm glad we are friends. I will never have him, maybe in another life, but definitely not this one and maybe its for the best, only fate can determine that.
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